By Dan Holohan

I once asked a friend how he had managed to become so financially successful. “I study what knuckleheads do,” he explained, “and then I do the opposite.”

Here is a recipe for complete and utter disaster. It contains wicked acts people in the heating industry have actually done, or have, on certain days, at least considered doing. Use it wisely. To be successful, study it well, and then do the opposite.

1. Have all your price quotes end with the numbers 666.

2. When the woman of the house comes downstairs to see how you’re doing, smile sweetly and say, “That’s a lovely dress you’re wearing, Mrs. Cleaver.”

3. Replace a steam boiler, but don’t flush out the old wet returns.

4. Never perform a heat loss calculation. Heat loss calculations are only for people who have had no real world experience. It’s always better to guess.

5. Get either of these vanity license plates: ICHEATU or ROBUBLND

Read the entire list.

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